2 Jul 2008

Perfection

Having been thinking about grace a lot I have been pondering perfection. I' ve always heard or understood from church that we are called to be like Jesus. That's a pretty big ask. Jesus was smart, never sinned, was good with words, had people hanging off his every word and action, loved everyone, didn't give up easily and a million other things I struggle with living up to.

I see this Jesus and I know that there is no way I could ever be like him. It would be great but I think it is a totally unrealistic goal. So quite often I give up and I decide maybe subconciously to just plod on. To struggle through life. To accept my flaws and hope that God still loves me and he is OK with me living at a sub par potential. I think at least I am saved, even if my life never amounts to much well at least I am going to Heaven, and sure this life won't last that long really.

Then I remember another Christian cliche. I remember that I am on a journey. It's cheesy but it's true. I remember that Jesus died for my whole salvation not just after I die. I remember that he did this knowing full well that I am a mess. Knowing that I like to give up. Knowing that I struggle with sin every day. But he still thought I was worth dying for. He still thought that it was worth giving up all his perfection in the hope that someday I would reach perfection or at least some level of maturity. He knew that I wouldn't get everything even after the millionth time. He knew that I would take one step forwards and two steps back. He knew I would have a hard time liking everyone, never mind loving them.

So why did he do this. Thinking about it I think he did it because he thinks my life is more important than his Glory. There must be something about my life that was worth giving up his Glory for. He swapped his perfection for my life. I find that hard to fathom. To him it was more important that I was alive than he was. Jesus is perfect and Holy and he gave all that up so I can know what that feels like.

And the thing is he knew I would so often reject that. I would try to do things my way, I would not take every opportunity to live like I should. I wouldn't realise that this gift would let me be fulfilled in relationships, in my job, in the things I enjoy doing. It's one thing giving up something for someone knowing you are going to get something back. But Jesus didn't know that. He knew I wouldn't give back. He knew it wasn't a fair deal for him.

But then again Grace isn't fair. I want this to spur me on to being who God knows I can be. It's the least I can do

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